Dream Lover and Dirty Pillows
by AllBlueChaser
Summary: A Fanforall fic. Prompt: Genderswapped Usopp gets suddenly expanding breasts. This finds our cook in perhaps the wrong type of shop, with the wrong type of item, and a perverted imagination that immediately affects Usopp across town. Raunchy. Humiliation.


A specialty herb and curio shop didn't hold much appeal to Usopp. He knew Sanji would be sure to check it out and recommend anything good he thought Usopp could use for weapons later. That meant the sniper could go check out the town this afternoon, specifically the hardware store, maybe get a drink, and meet up again with Sanji with nothing to worry about for once.

Sanji examined the herbs and clicked his tongue at the odd combinations. The oils and herbs all had weird things added like kitten whiskers and newt tears. Not good eats. That's when he found himself more in the curio part of the store. Before he turned around and headed down a more reasonable (he hoped) aisle of food related herbs, his eye caught on a milky white doll with a little red heart embroidered on the chest. He picked it up and thought of Usopp.

Hadn't Usopp made plushies of the crew like this once?

Sanji smiled at the memory.

Maybe he'd like this?

His eyeballs nearly popped from his skull when he spied the price.

"Hey. What's with the price on this?" He asked the vender as he waved the seemingly innocent doll in the air.

"Oh! Good eye sir! That's a dream lover. You hold it tight, envision your perfect lover and they'll come to you!"

"Heh." An overpriced good luck charm?

"Give it a try sir, what do you have to lose?"

"That's true. Let's see, my dream lover…" Sanji held the doll in his arms and concentrated. "For starters, she would be beautiful."

Across town Usopp suddenly felt warm and closed his eyes, grabbing at the rack of wrenches as he was overcome by a heated full body shiver.

When she opened her eyes her memories had taken a slight tint into a female point of view but else wise stayed pretty much the same. Maybe she had a little more confidence since she knew she was pretty.

She took a look in the chrome reflection of some hub caps and ran a hand through her rich, voluminous curls. She pressed her bee-stung lips together in thought. Had she looked this way a moment ago?

Her tan skin had a healthy glow and seemed to gleam in the reflection. Her white blouse accented her perfectly in proportion cleavage between suspenders leading down to her olive green ruffled mini skirt. That skirt showed of her toned legs and cute heels that were simple, stylish. and still had function enough to handle a full out sprint from danger.

She was pretty. So why did she remember Sanji ignoring her over in favor of their navigator for so long? She pouted at the thought. Maybe he'd been intimidated by the great captain Usopp's good looks? Or the fact she had the complete package? That had to be it. Men were stupid.

Suddenly there was a gasp behind her and as she turned to find the stock boy had dropped an armful of dip sticks in surprise.

"I! Uh! You startled me, I thought there was only a guy in the shop and I don't remember you coming in…"

"Huh? But I said hello to you when I came in, remember?"

"Really flirtatious.." Sanji added across town.

Usopp stepped closer with a pouty frown that hinted at a smile as she lent down to give the boy a better look at her cleavage.

"Am I really so forgettable?" Usopp purred in a fake hurt voice. The boy would have remembered her but violently shook his head as he let his eyes dip for a peak at what she was offering.

"And large plump breasts." The cook told the doll with a lecherous smile.

The shop boy suddenly spurted a massive nose bleed as he looked down, expecting only a better view of the respectable, perky B cups only to be suddenly stunned with a bu-bump of large, juicy, plump C or D cup breasts, the tops of which formed deep, inviting cleavage that popped the young beauty's top two buttons, seemingly without her notice.

"Oh! Are you okay?" Usopp leaned in more concerned. What was she doing, being so flirtatious without wearing a bra! She knew the effect her large breasts could have on people if she wasn't careful. She couldn't help flirting a bit though, it was as fun and integral to her personality as boasting was. Why didn't she wear a bra though? She couldn't remember.

The stock boy felt another surge of blood about to spurt and threw up his arm to keep the newly busty bombshell away…accidentally touching a large, soft breast in the process.

"With nipples that get hard when touched and sensitive enough to turn her on with the slightest friction." Sanji wipes his nose with an offered tissue to get a grip on his own bloody nose as he pictured it.

"Hey! Watch it!" Usopp started to grouse. Flirting was one thing, but she didn't come her to get felt up! She reached up and pushed the palm off her chest. It brushed over her nipple and she gasped as she felt it harden under his hand. Apparently he felt it too and looked up at her curiously, before fighting gravity and letting his hand remain where it was. He realizes now for the first time she isn't wearing a bra as he feels the nubby nipple beneath the cotton beneath his fingers.

She would have pushed the hand away again, harder or even smacked this pervert if she wasn't immediately distracted by a sudden arousal starting to spark in her.

"And she wouldn't be able to hide it when she is aroused! I want her to be vocal enough that I know what she likes…." Sanji sighs happily.

"Mmm…let me go…" She partially moans in demand, a little huskier than she'd like.

The boy didn't let go. Instead he grins at his apparent luck and grabs her other breast, squeezing them both at once and rubbing his thumbs quickly over the thick, prominent nipples protruding from her shirt.

Usopp throws her head back and lets out an unconstrained moan as arousal rocks her body and moistens her panties, making her squirm.

"Oh! Ohhhhh!"

Encouraged by this reaction the boy starts to pull, pinch, and twist the nipples, making them even more pronounced.

"Ohh!Ohhh! Noo! Stop!" Usopp bit into her tender lip in an attempt to control herself but couldn't help it as a needy moan of pleasure escapes her lips. That's why she didn't wear a bra today. Her nipples were too sensitive! It was better to jiggle a little than be so thigh rubbingly horny and wet all day. Still she was a brave warrior of the sea! Like hell she was just going to be molested in a store! (Even if she was enjoying it.)What if her nakama saw? She wanted to be taken seriously!

With a hard 'TWACK' she used her kabuto as a staff and cracked the boy up between his legs. The boy was on the floor moments later moaning in pain. Usopp took a deep shaky breath and waited until the arousal slowly dissipated.

"I said NO! I'll have you know I'm actually a revered virgin princess in my country and touching me without my permission could get you beheaded! I'm taking these wrenches…and this oil…Oh! Are these ball bearings fillable? I'm taking some of these too in compensation." Usopp stuffed the items into her bag and noticed her shirt was now raised up several inches, enough to show her feminine stomach and that she was missing three buttons. The effect pretty much her cleavage practically popping out on display, hypnotically jiggling with each step she took. It made her feel a little self-conscious. That's weird, she was pretty sure she was more covered when she came in.

"What else? Ohh….yes. She loves to wear revealing clothing…"

Usopp giggles at her reflection in the stores glass window as she walks toward the counter. Was she really just thinking she might be showing too much skin? Ha! When was she not showing a little skin? In fact, her skirt could be a little shorter.

Her purse clinked as she headed for the door and felt the need to stop and explain the noise to the clerk.

"Your stock boy got a little fresh so I compensated myself okay?" She pats her filled clinking bag with a flirtatious smile and a wink.

The man was trying his best not to stare at this girls lightly jiggling breasts.

"Sure doll, my shop doesn't get lookers like you too often…"

"Princess Usoppoko thanks you!" And with that a little bell jingled as she left the store. The clerk watched after her as she started her walk across the street toward the tavern.

"And she'd wear only the sexiest panties or none at all…" A cook blocks away swooned.

A stiff breeze whipped up Usopp's ruffled skirt before he could catch it, showing the hardware clerk and a few other people on the street a glimpse of her naughty black silk thong with a lacey trip and a red embroidered 'Eat Me' written in fairy tale script right where there was a darker patch of moisture from the earlier arousal.

She blushed as she hurridly held her skirt down. See! This is why she like short, tighter skirts! Those never flew up! Only their perverted cook was supposed to see those panties!

They'd been together since Skypia with a rocky patch when she had lost confidence and left the crew with Merry, but afterward they were stronger than ever even if it was kept under wraps.

A few steps across the street she slips onto a bar stool next to Zoro and gives him a smile.

"Hey."

Zoro looked up from his booze and nods in a distant sort of polite way.

"Hey."

He seriously hoped this girl wasn't hitting on him. She was definitely the cooks type though considering there was something Usoppy about this rather busty woman and he was pretty sure the cook was hiding some sort of feelings for the sniper.

Sanji smirked at the doll in his hands.

"If we're lovers then we love each other already, and I already find her smart and funny. She's loyal to me and I'm her ideal, so I won't feel threatened that she thinks about sex more then most men, especially dick and things she likes to do with it. That way no matter how far away she is she'll always be in the mood when she sees me."

The bartender didn't mind repeating himself to the dish at the bar with big tits. The longer she vacantly looked away was longer her could stare at her rack.

"What do you want, babe?" He tried again.

Usopp snapped out of her momentarily fog and grins at the bartender.

"Cock."

Internally she screamed in mortification. Why the hell did she just say the first thing that popped into her mind.

"…Tail." She hastily bluffed. "I'd like a cocktail. Yes."

"Sure babe, what kind?"

"Uhhh…" She had no idea. She was actually wanting a sour cherry fizz but then she started daydreaming about Sanji and wishing it was the cook next to him and not Zoro. Heh. She'd tease him about giving him a blowjob right there. Then his mind asked in wonder what that would be with Zoro. Sanji was better of course but Zoro was a rival to Sanji in a lot of ways. She pictured herself unzipping Zoro's pants and taking him into her mouth. She was picturing it when she had heard the bartender that second time. Now she was stuck trying to remember the names of cocktails.

To her dismay they had sexy names that immediately made her think of doing things. Screaming Orgasm…Sex on the Beach…

"Mmmm…uhh…" She squirmed in her seat as she was bombarded with triple x-rated images and moaned as she felt herself grow warm.

The bartender grinned. An honest to goodness bimbo in his bar. He loved it.

"Oh I know something you'd like." He smirked as he poured mystery ingredients Usopp wasn't familiar with into a glass. She felt her flirtatiousness kick in and twirled one of her curls between her fingers. The bartender was pretty cute (although Sanji was even better.)

"I bet you do. Show me what you got."

"Baby, you'll be begging for more." He promised as he starts to hand her the drink.

Meanwhile, back at the curio shop Usopp was being granted a brief reprieve as Sanji had lit a cigarette and the clerk was throwing a fit about the smoke tainting the delicate aura on his shops items. Sanji would normally just relent and just put it out but the clerk was being such an ass and there was already a shitty incense in the air that the cook felt his smoke actually improved the environment if anything. After a heated argument that left the shop keeper terrified and yet asking Sanji to put it out again nicely. Sanji begrudgingly did so before looking back to the doll.

"Where was I? Ah…my dream lover…with great breasts I could use for pillows!"

To be fair, Sanji was only fantasizing about what his dream lover could already provide but to whatever magic that was affecting the strawhat sniper, this was a new and entirely different command dealing with proportion.

Usopp reaches out to take the drink when the bartender stupidly drops the drink in shock as the girls tits in front of him surge forward, defying gravity as they expand larger and larger into huge pillowy zeplins…pulling the already shrinking shirt up to barely cover her nipples, while the top of the shirt pops three buttons leaving her shirt straining to contain the massive breasts with the only two remaining buttons.

Not that it matters, because that icy drink the bartender dropped bounced off her boobs and soaked her white shirt, making it a see through sheath that presented her breasts and now frozen, hard nipples, more obscenely on display than if she was without a shirt at all!

"AH!" Usopp hops off the stool she feels he massive chest jiggle and bounce and her hand fly to cover her visible nipples before anyone else could see the white fabric clinging to her nipples every bump and outline. Her face flames as her palms warm and rub the sensitive nipples. She moans despite her genuine desire not to further embarrass herself, but even as she breathes her chest heaves and hard nipples drag against her small fingers. Intense pleasure surges down to her clit and her knees nearly buckle with arousal.

"OH! MMmmm!"

The whole bar is staring at her as she tries to rush to the door and she knows it looks like she's getting off, massaging her nearly visible breasts but she's trying to hide her nipples best she can. It's just her hands are so small and breasts so big, as she moves her breasts overflow out of her cupped hands, causing her to have to scrabble after them, accidentally manhandling them in the process.

She tries to bite her lip and hide her increasingly aroused state as she heads for the door but as crystal tears form in the corners of her eyes a gaspy whine of need slips past her defenses.

Mortified, she gives up any hope of dignity, grabs her nipples to hide them, and to keep them contained (and NOT hitting her in the face). She runs.

The contained bounce as she runs make her pinch her nipples and accidentally pull them. She groans. Her thighs quickly grow slick, the tiny panties doing little to stop the flow of her lubricant down the tops of her thighs. She felt so dirty. So exposed. So horny.

Sanji. She needed Sanji. She didn't know why her shirt had suddenly shrunk but he had a jacket and could shield her as they walked back to the Sunny. Sanji could help. She gasps in arousal and moans.

As she runs she keeps chanting his name in her head. Sanji. Sanji. Sanji.

By the time she reached the curio shop door she felt frustrated and needy and didn't give a damn about cover or his jacket. She was so turned on, she needed to fuck Sanji now. His lips, his hands on her. His beautiful hard cock thrusting in her, yes…GOD she needed relief!

"Sounds perfect. Shall we ring her up?" The shop keeper asked, sensing the blond had been lost in fantasy for some time now with nothing else to add.

"Pft! No! This bundle of cloth is just a hallow fantasy."

Usopp put her hand on the door handle and pulled it open, immediately locking on to her perfect lover.

"I already have a dream lover and he's the real man, the nakama, I held in my arms this morning." He admits with a small grin, letting his secret slip to someone he'll never see again.

Usopp had no idea how he got here. Wasn't he just in the hardware store? The was extra weight in his bag so he must have finished. That was just a passing thought though. As he spotted Sanji he was over come with a desire that was just on the tip of his tongue. He couldn't figure it out but surged forward anyway and kissed the cook long and hard, grinding his stiff erection into his hip.

The clerk pried the dream lover out of Sanji's hands before it drops and the two lovers part panting and flushed with arousal.

"Damn it! I should kick your head in! We're being descript, remember? What's gotten into you?"

Usopp had no idea but that never stops a good story.

"A great story!" Usopp starts, ready to tell an adventure to somehow explain what he doesn't remember. "I'll tell you about it but let's go back to the Sunny and…" Usopp wiggled his eyebrows and pressed his hardness into Sanji again. Sanji wanted to kick him.

But he also wanted something else so he ushered him back to the ship and a very happy ending.

END

Omake-

That night at dinner, Zoro smirked at Sanji across the table while Chopper was explaining to Usopp that temporary amnesia was common after a sudden trauma. Usopp remarks he's glad not to remember it then when Sanji can't take it anymore.

"What marimo?"

"You missed out at the bar today cook, that's all. A girl came in that you would have LOVED. Seriously."

Sanji considers this a moment before looking at Usopp and smirking back to Zoro.

"Hmmm. Nah. Even if I did trust your shitty taste, which I don't, I wouldn't trade anything for what I was doing this afternoon."

A shriek came out across the kitchen as Chopper flailed his arms in panic as Usopp's face turned red.

"AH! Usopp's got a fever! Someone call a doctor!"


End file.
